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Chronicles

Defending the Defense

Being a Noble is not simply making important decisions and being adored by those you walk by all the time. There are moments that can be very taxing. Today, I was relaxing in a personal bath heated by lava stones imported from the World’s Edge Mountains, enjoying my Bordeleaux, and enjoying a slow…

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How dare you call me a liar!?! You little maggot! I should pull out my codpiece and slap you stupid with it! What? It’s not you but the Minotaur what’s callin’ me a liar? Well … I suppose he is paying me a fair bit’o’swag for you idiot scribes to scratch that there parchment with a cockatrice…

No Pre-Season

WHADDYA MEAN, “NO PRE-SEASON”? No! Go away! I meant it you little maggot! Not now! Bugger off! I don’t care if I’ve gotta contract! Woe betide he who in his pride and arrogance angers the little Goblin scribe. For this latter shall write what he seeth fit into the most valuable chronicle of the…

An Offending Offense

Let’s begin with stating the obvious. Imperial Nobility teams are head and shoulders above many other teams thanks to one thing: versatility. To properly wield the weapons available to these teams, a brilliant coach, such as myself, is needed. Some teams use only dumb, brute strength to obtain…

Style of Play: Defence

Right, so you’ve got a team, you’ve got a game plan for when you’re team’s on offence, now you need one for when your team’s on defence. So, last time out I talked about how your Boyz’ll need to have your way of playing beaten into their thick noggins and how the challenge will be getting a pack of…

Style of Play: Offence

OK, once you’ve built your team of Black Orcs, you’re gonna have to beat your way of playing want into their thick noggins. This means you’ve gotta do the hard work on the training pitch. Yeah, I know, the Boyz is lazy and the Gobbos even worse.

How to Build a Band of Boys for League Play

It’s a heavy burden but I bear it. It’s a weight on my shoulders but also a beast that pursues me. It’s an elixir that gives me energy and a codpiece that restrains me. Thus it is to be Gorn N’hleg. You see, I’m no ordinary Orc. I’m literate, for one thing. I mean, I can’t actually scratch parchment…

I Only Fail at Failure

Good day, everyone. My name is Baron Rhouven von Wurzenheim, and if you’re reading this, chances are you are like us; that is to say, you are cultured, refined, and, of course, debonair. I like that word, Nathan. It’s Bretonnian. I hope you know how to spell it. I’d spell it out for you but then I’d…

I’m Cursed With Success

It’s a heavy burden but I bear it. It’s a weight on my shoulders but also a beast that pursues me. It’s an elixir that gives me energy and a codpiece that restrains me. Thus it is to be Gorn N’hleg. You see, I’m no ordinary Orc. I’m literate, for one thing. I mean, I can’t actually scratch parchment…